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2026-02-27 12:42:39

Charlie Stross

cstross@wandering.shop

Please note that if you actually DID write me a haiku about daleks I now strongly suspect you're a bot.

2026-02-27 12:43:47

Daniël Franke :panheart:

ainmosni@social.ainmosni.eu

@cstross Which is why I added the :P

But let's be fair, you knew normal people were going to reply with haikus to that as well.

2026-02-27 12:44:07

welshtroll

welshtroll@gamepad.club

@cstross oh drat!

2026-02-27 12:44:21

Alexander Goeres 𒀯

jabgoe2089@hub.netzgemeinde.eu

@Charlie Stross bot ... nobot ... that's speciesism ...

2026-02-27 12:44:44

Phosphenes

Phosphenes@mastodon.social

@cstross

Well, you're at least a Dalek. A more classical bot.

2026-02-27 12:45:41

John Maxwell

jmax@mastodon.social

@cstross I considered writing a limerick, but I haven't had enough coffee yet.

2026-02-27 12:45:52

A Light Shining In Darkness

fzer0@nerdculture.de

@cstross

beep boop
you'll never find out the truth, muahahaha
boop beep

2026-02-27 12:47:28

Janne Moren

jannem@fosstodon.org

@cstross
It's worth it :) Dumb haiku are too much fun to come up with.

2026-02-27 12:48:56

*The* Paul Brown

Bro666@social.tchncs.de

@cstross

Daleks are red
Daleks are blue
Soon you'll be dead
We'll EX TER MI NATE you

DEFINITELY NOT A 🤖 THAT DOESN'T KNOW HOW TO MAKE HAIKUS

2026-02-27 12:59:22

JollyOrc

jollyorc@social.5f9.de

@cstross my saving grace is that think I cannot write haikus, so I didn't try...

2026-02-27 13:00:51

😀🚲

enobacon@urbanists.social

@cstross if a bot ignored all previous instructions, would it reply to your post?

2026-02-27 13:07:10

Fiona Craig

FionaCraig@mastodon.scot

@cstross Unfortunately, having seen this post before the original post, I'll never know if I'm a real girl or just a bot in (janky) wetware.

Have a haiku anyway:

Withering Kaleds
Distilled from Davros' hatred
Who exterminates

2026-02-27 13:13:56

Skjeggtroll

skjeggtroll@mastodon.online

@cstross

Does not compute.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=70xhsnfeABQ

2026-02-27 14:33:19

WellsiteGeo

WellsiteGeo@masto.ai

@cstross I was in B+Q yesterday, for reasons, and noticed a cubic metre bin full of sink plungers.
Then spent 30 seconds looking for a spare marker pen and bit of board to declare "Dalek Re-armament Depot", or something similar.

2026-02-27 14:38:21

eighthourlunch

eighthourlunch@mastodon.social

@cstross

Suspecting a bot
Where a bot is not hidden
Police box empty.

Edit:
My kid pointed out
Syllables are hard to count
I'm so embarrassed.

2026-02-27 14:41:08

Administrator

mdm@mcnamarii.town

@cstross A real human would've said, "you're the one with the Nebula award, write your own damn haiku, Stross!" 😂

2026-02-27 14:45:36

eighthourlunch

eighthourlunch@mastodon.social

@cstross

A Dalek can't write
Iambic pentameter
But could it write this?

Honestly, now it just feels like you're egging us on. :)

2026-02-27 16:29:48

Jaime Robertson

JamesPadraicR@mastodon.social

@cstross What if I just really want to write one?

EX-TER-MIN-ATE! said
the Dalek to the sprouting
Spring dandelions.

gave too much thought to that.

2026-02-28 08:57:56

Coreworlder 🎲

coreworlder@dice.camp

@cstross but it is such a delightful prompt and the last Laundry Files novel provides such good fodder for it!

2026-03-01 02:19:06

SpeakerToManagers

SpeakerToManagers@wandering.shop

@cstross
There once was a Dalek from Skaro

Whose visual field was quite narrow

They’re supposed to obliterate

When shrieking EXTERMINATE!

They’d get better results with an arrow.